That's what she said: my date with the palm reader

If Allie is reading this she is rebuking me. I'm judging this on the fact that when I had my fortune told on my 21st birthday in New Orleans, she ran away saying "I rebuke that!" Turns out that Ms. Jackson Square psychic was no good. She told me I would meet my soulmate in December of 2006 and his name would start with an "M." So, naturally, every boy I met whose name started with an M was fat or heinous or both. I denied fate.

SO, after our adventures at the Fort, Casey's host family had us over for Sunday lunch. After our feast and some lounging around, I asked Ms. Tanwar, Casey's host mom, to read my palm. Casey had told me that she's very good...although she told Casey that she would have a "very hard life."

"Do you believe in this stuff?" someone asked me.
"It depends on what she says," I replied, "I'll decide later."

And so, after much studying of both my skinny, ogre hands- and some poking around and bending of my fingers and thumbs- these are the results of my most thorough palm reading to date:

One of my biggest faults is that I'm indecisive. My other major flaw is that I think with my heart and not my head and make most of my decisions based on emotions as opposed to rational thought. Because I'm so indecisive, I should trust the opinion of an older, wiser person that I'm close to. (Mom has already claimed this role as she somehow knows everything I do and has all the right answers.)

Being indecisive can lead me to miss opportunities. When I see a chance, I should take it instead of thinking that I'll have many more chances.

I have a great luck line and will have lots of luck and fame in life. (Get excited!) Also, I will have "an easy life" with "two incomes." I hope this means my husband will have 2 jobs because I don't plan on working. My life is supposed to be long, although there are breaks in my lifeline. This means that I will have lots of mental distress. "Do you get depressed easily?" she asked. I just laughed. And I got kinda scared.

Also, she told me that I get angry too easily- but I mean well and I have a good heart. Many people think they know me, but only people who have lived with me or been around me for a long time truly know me. (Does this mean I'm mysterious??? Ha.) And (I thought this was interesting, actually) I am a different person on the inside than the outside. Kind of like when Ms. Sims said "She looks like an angel but there's a tiger inside." Maybe.

"You will have love marriage, not arranged marriage," she informed me. Whew, good to know...
And I'm supposed to meet this love marriage person sometime between this December and next December. This period is called my "engagement chance." I will probably miss this chance...nothing good can happen in December (except Christmas) it's too cold and depressing.

Oh, and in India, a girl's left hand shows her own fate and her right hand shows her husband's fate. The lines on my left hand are a lot more shallow and messy, which supposedly means that I'm more emotional and "messed up" than my future husband. Makes sense.

And here's the kicker-

"You will have own house," Ms. Tanwar said in a happy voice.
"That's good," I thought.
"when you are 35," she continued.
"What do I do until then?" I asked.
"Live with parents. Your parents or his parents."

WHAT?! She might not know that we don't really do the extended-family-living-arrangement-thing in the USA. I chose to disregard this part of the palm reading.

I'd like to hear your thoughts on all this. Are her predictions so broad that they could be applied to lots of people?

The picture is of Cynthia and Ms. Tanwar after she read her palm.

AND, speaking of "that's what she said," a special thanks to mom for THE OFFICE DVDS!!! And books and The Economist. I read both issues front to back in one day. Glorious.


mamaoftwo said...

Kali---have I got a guy for you! Picture this: Tall, very nice-looking, 28 yrs old, chemical engineer, French-speaking, wine loving and from Belgium! He's
here working for an American company (Belgium owned) and needs to meet a young, beautiful, fun-loving American girl. That's you. When are you
coming home? ---Mrs. Morrison

Pam said...

ummm...think I fall into the rebuking camp with Allie.
Wouldn't all right handed people have deeper lines on the right hand and left handed people have deeper lines on the left hand? More emotional than husband -- 99.9% of females fall into that category. Disappointed about the arranged marriage thing though...but on the upside, I can spend that dowry on my renovation!!!

Morgan said...

I don't trust her, the lines on my left hand look the same as the lines on my right hand.

Kali said...

Mom, you don't read carefully. I'm NOT having an arranged marriage.

And, Mrs. Morrison, you are a nut!

Pam said...

I know you're not having an arranged marriage...that is why I don't have to have a dowry to pay the husband's family...so I can spend it on my renovations....
so take it back (I do read carefully).

Lindsey said...

Hey Kali!
It won't let me vote! :( And, I think you will be rich and famous
By the way, this was a really funny entry.
I think it was a pretty good palm reading. I'm glad you will marry for love, and I cracked up at the idea of you and your husband living with Pam and Don until you are 35!! I think your mom would fork up a "dowry" just to get yall out of the house if that were the case.
However, I also think you are very logical, and I haven't ever considered you to be indecisive. Everyone falls victim to making some decisions based on emotion, so I think that's a safe assessment of almost every woman’s personality.
But, I agree that you will be lucky, you will be successful, and you do have a wonderful heart.

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